today is one of the hard days, the days where i just want to crawl back from whatever rock i emerged from. hide from the sun, hide from the light. i am too exposed, and resent it. why am i like this today, i dunno... i am mourning the absence of the significant other, the other year that just leaped on me, the sunday that came two days to late, the shallowness of everyday life. i wanna go and get drunk, to flee from whatever reason and normality i can, to drink and laugh and don't think. i want to hide in someone's arms, someone i don't know, but who will love me for the night, who will make me feel wanted, safe, needed... i want to run away, pack my bags and go, go somewhere no one knows me, where i can start all over. i want to shed this flesh, to emerge as another person, as another being. i want to be not me, i want to be seen as not me, as me, but not in this flesh. and still, do i not crave to be seen? i want to scream at him, and scream at people, i want to hurt someone, and be known as the ice queen, i want to be loved and cared for, i want to hate and hurt. today is one of the hard days, the days where nothing can ever be right, where the sun is too rbight and the dark is not dark enough. this is one of the days i will hurt myself, and let my insanity run wild, this is one of the days i will regret...
moonwha had a thoughtful moment at 14:09 | link | comments on this shit
